BYTHECATHEDRAL

TIME TO SAY GOODBYE

I have to sleep on it, but this might be the last post....

THE HOLE

I love scary movies. I usually find bad ones.

This time. I found a good one.

Not only is it scary but also really fucking good.
I know there are people out there who don't like scary movies. It is weird. They are odd people, but they are out there. Please. Give this one a shot.

It was released in 2001 - and shown only in the UK and Canada. Something about keep Kiera Knightly image clean. It stars Thora Birch as well.

Fucking fabulous film.

HERE WE GO AGAIN

We broke  up. I saw it coming. It was fucking depressing to be together - he had so much shit that was crashing down...

It wasn't a bad breakup. No - "I don't think we work". "I am just not into you."

It was "I need space." I would usually flip out and think fine...you don't like me obviously and throwing this "I need space" bullshit in my face.

Then I heard it. It wasn't that. It was a man who was losing his mind and needed to get it together.

I don't know if I'll ever see him again. Maybe he will get his space, figure shit out, and move to a different country ( this is a plausible solution unfortunately).

For once though - I am letting it go. I am not going to try and change it. We hook up again great. It will be the third time.

Hopefully the timing will work out.

I also need space. Mentally. Fucked up. You know you are in trouble when someone asks to you to remember a proud moment in your life, and you look at them blankly.

Them: There must be something. Graduation? Jobs? Anything?

Me: Fuck-ups don't have proud moments.

silence.

Yeah - I got shit to work out.

MY EX

I've been dreaming about my ex. I don't know why. Our relationship was a train-wreck.

Here are the reasons why I am probably dreaming about him, and why that can't be possible.

1) I love him.
1b) I don't love him. BELIEVE me - there is absolutely no love there. Just pure indifference. 

2) I feel guilt.
2b) I forgave myself a long time ago.

3)Maybe he is getting married and I am getting some premonition.
3b) I don't need to know that.

4) Maybe my subconscious is trying to tell me something.
4b) Tell me something  - don't bring my idiot ex into it. 

I SAW ANOTHER ONE

I saw another model. She was going to Brooklyn. She was very thin, tall, perfect bone structure, and beautiful.  Unfortunately for me - she decided to sit next to me. So here I am this chubby ( in my mind) little black girl with no make-up ( I don't wear any) my hair probably a mess. There I was. I am thinking, "Why does  she have to sit next to me?"

I am sure this says something about my self-esteem. In the words of George ( Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf),

"I am not drunk enough to figure it out."

I would think that all the guys on the train would gawk at her. Nope. They looked at her. They looked away.

They didn't even sit across from her so they can stare. That is what guys usually do if they find you attractive. Stare.

Nothing. I would think it was me, but they weren't even looking at me. See folks? I disappeared because of her.

Nothing. Hmm. Maybe that is why models can't get real dates? I always hear this, and my reaction is,

"Shut the fuck up perfect model girl."

Maybe it was true. 

DAVID CHAPPELLE SHOW

I don't have cable, but I do have NETFLIX. Rented the David Chappelle show. Funniest thing ever.

Highly Highly Recommend. I know I am the last person on this earth not to see this show. I am hoping there is somewhere out there like me. Let's Unite! Let's see Season 2!

ILOVETODANCEDANCEWITHME

I think the best part of the "Kelly Ripa SNL sketch" is when she starts spontaneously dancing.

i don't do drugs, but if I did that particular drug, I believe I would end up spontaneously dancing and darting my eyes. I forgot to mention once the dancing stop I would probably start talking about everything that is going on in my head at the moment. "Ilovethatskirtiusedtolovehimoooohlet'sgetpizza."

I mean. That is what I would do. I don't know. I think I would.

CRACK IS FOR SHAMPOO

Best SNL skit or one of the best...

                                    Kelly Ripa

EVERYTHING IS WONDERFUL

You can't look at the negative.








Look at the positive!
 

LET'S PUT A SMILE ON THOSE FACES

 

None of this gloom and doom.

It ain't all bad.