BYTHECATHEDRAL

SONOFA

 

The week - Phone got turned off. Of course, since I never had my home phone turned off before I was confused. I thought maybe the weird message I got would go away. Wait. Wait. Call Verizon.

Me: Yeah. I keep getting this weird message when I try and make a phone call.

Verizon: Do you get a dial tone?

Me: Yes.

Verizon: Did you pay your bill?

Me: ( thinking back to my disastrous effort to do it online, and then saying "screw it" I will do it later. That was three weeks ago) Um. Not yet.

Verizon: Well, it looks like they turned off your phone for nonpayment.

Me: What?!

Verizon: ( bored. She has done this a million times before). Yeah.

Me: What? ( Thinking. What they turned off my phone for 60 bucks?!!)

Hang up. Look for the bill. Where the hell is it? Go past statements from my bank that I haven't opened. Con Edison. Keyspan. Start opening those. Manageable. Mental note. Pay them. Find Verizon bill. Open it. OMG! That is more than 60 bucks. Shit.

See my therapist..Sobbing. ."My life sucks...blah blah...and now my credit is shot."

She says. " Hey. I got my phone turned off too. You just forget to pay the bills. It happens. If you pay your bills on time for the next year...or two...it should be fine. (pause. she smiles.) I wouldn't recommend buying a house this year though."

Ahh...she got me to smile. I am going to like this woman.

Got the flu too this week. FABULOUS.

RESOLUTION

I had a miserable day today....maybe that is why I have started this fixation on my body. I just need to start taking better care of myself.  I used to...I would go to the gym, eat right ( cooking instead of take-out)...drinking water. I feel like I am looking at a stranger when I think back to that. 

I just need to start getting it together. Michael Jackson and I need to  work it out and get it together.

Still no word from the scottish guy....
Maybe i should do an daily update on that. Day 3. still no word. Day 4. how will we ever cope?? Day 5. Is he having a martini with someone other than me??? Day 6. If I can't have him no one can. Day 7. "I can't live if living is without you...."
ha!

A LITTLE PIECE OF ME

I always see these ads for donating eggs? What does that entail exactiy? They are willing to pay so much for it....it seems almost worth considering. Of course, that makes me selfish to think only of the money, but i need it. my bills aren't going to pay themselves.

I wouldn't have an emotional attachment. It is an egg. I am not raising it. It won't be in my body for nine months.  Could it be any different from sperm donation?

Something worth consideration...